Mom

My Mom & Dad

I haven't posted for ages but after losing my mom it seems like a good place to journal some of my thoughts about her and losing her.  I cannot believe the funeral was already a week ago or that it was over a week since I spent those last few hours with her.  She wasn't talking but was responding by raising her eyebrows or opening her eyes when my sisters talked to her on the phone or those of us there talked to her.  I know she knows we were there & we were with her.  I don't remember exactly what the last thing I said was before she died, it was just Mom and I when it happened.  I got there about 5:30 after Grace's Girl Scout meeting, left about 10:00, and returned about 11:00.  I told her I was there and was going to stay all night.  She was gone when I checked on her at 11:35.  It was so peaceful that I wasn't sure.

I saw a prayer answered that day. I talked to my sister at about 2:30 that afternoon, we needed to decide if we wanted to give Mom a feeding tube to see if she would regain her strength or not do the procedure and start hospice care.  I prayed for God to make the decision for us.  By the time I got to the hospital she had deteriorated to a stage where the feeding tube was no longer possible. In a few hours time I saw HIS intervention and my prayer answered.

She has had MS for about 25 years.  It was diagnosed my senior year of high school. Now after having that disease for so long, 10 years in a nursing home, not being able to walk or have the strength to do all those things she wanted to do when she retired (write children's books, help Grandma get her GED, play with her grandkids) she now can.  She is no longer confined to a wheelchair or bed.  She can now walk and dance and do anything.  She can see us whenever she wants to now not have to wait for a visitor to come to the nursing home. 

There are moments when I forget.  I think of something I need to tell her, or want to go visit when I'm driving around town. Those are the saddest moments.  Gracie is missing her Grandma terribly.  I have held her more than one night while she cuddles the toy dog she always played with at Grandma's and cries.  Lila misses her too but isn't able to express it as well so she's having nightmares and being very emotional.  It's hard to see my little girls hurting.  

Other than Mom's death we have been busy with the usual things in life.  Lila had 2 teeth crowned, they gave her oral sedation medication so she was really loopy from that for a day. 

Halloween was a fun filled weekend of costumes, pumpkin carving, and trick or treaters.  We are now preparing for Thanksgiving and more family time. 

2 tired little girls with all their loot!

American Diabetes Month

My sister & I both have Type 1 Diabetes.  Please join us and Bret Michaels to raise awareness during November, American Diabetes Month. 

rip Mr Monarch

The butterfly hatched but his wings didn't dry properly so he didn't survive.  We read online that only 2% make it in the wild so his chances were pretty low anyway.  Even with his withered up little wings he was very pretty. 

It was a fun learning experience for Grace. Gerry & I learned a lot of facts about butterflies too.  Lila has added butterfly to her vocabulary.  These things make it all worthwhile. 

Season of Change

I'm sitting here fascinated by the chrysallis our caterpillar spun today and thinking of all the changes going on around me. 

Becky, Natalia, and Connor are flying home as I type.  I keep thinking about what we will do together this week and then realize our wonderful summer together is at an end.  Thanksgiving seems far, far, away. 

Grace starts first grade on Tuesday.  I will miss her being home every day but know she will have so much fun and learn so much this year, like she did last year. 

Lila starts preschool on Thursday.  It's a big change when your baby will be gone every morning.  She will do so well and will change and learn so much!  What will I do to keep busy when she's not here? 

It's a beautiful cool day, only about 80 degrees, with a light breeze.  Is this change in the weather the beginning of fall or just a break from the heat of this past summer?  I love fall and that peaceful, reminiscent mood it invokes. 

Happy Anniversary to us!

August 4, 2009 was the day we officially adopted our Lila.  We met her on August 3 then returned to the adoption center the next day to sign the final papers and take the oath.  It doesn't seem possible that it has already been a year. It seems like we were just in China. Look at the changes in her in the slideshow.  It amazes me to see how much she has grown and the happiness in her expression.  She was so scared at first but her true happy, outgoing, silly, sweet, loving, affectionate, personality has shone through.  Our baby is now a little girl ready to start preschool in a couple weeks.   She is all we hoped for during the long, long wait. The perfect little daughter for our family.

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Happy Birthday to me!

Today is my birthday which so far has been a great day but it in no way compares to last year on this very day when we were on the plane on the way to China!  It does not seem like a year already. 

(self-portrait on the plane or "Lila here we come")

I'm working on my big post for our 1 year Adoption Day anniversary next week. 

And before I forget again, who was it that told Gerry her kids read our blog at the CHI reunion?  Hi!! 

Children's Hope Reunion 2010

AJ with Lila, Me with Mikayla, Gerry with Grace

The big girls in the hot tub. Christine and the little girls in the pool.

Bec trying to hide from the mosquitos (I'm STILL itching...)

At the zoo (Maryn, Maelyn, Lila, Mikayla, Grace)

How cute is this??? (Lila and Max)

Playing at the huge playground at the reunion.

Have you ever seen a face this sweet? (Mikayla)

We just returned from a long weekend in St Louis. Our adoption agency is based there. They have a reunion every 2 years for ALL the families that have ever adopted through them all around the world. It was a great reason to go to St Louis to see the friends we traveled with. We were able to get together with 5 of the families that were in our travel group of 19 families last August. We were all together at the reunion, then had a smaller gathering at Kevin & Stacy's Saturday evening, Sunday we headed to the zoo then back to the pool at the hotel. So much fun to see the people that we have shared so much with.