Saturday August 8

We are now in Guangzhou. We're happy to be one step closer to getting our little one home. I will miss China. It is still a little unreal to actually be here.

We went to Shamian Island this morning to have the Visa photos taken and have the kids' medical exams. There were 10 families in the group this morning. After the exams we were free to shop for a couple hours. We went in groups and kept running into others, switching groups. trying out different shops, and really enjoying the island. I bought a pair of silk pajamas for Lila, matching squeaky shoes, and a beautiful chongsam for Grace. We browsed some more and then got 2 green marble pigs, 1 for Lila, 1 for Jessica and a tshirt for Gerry. Jessica has always collected pigs and Lila was born in the year of the pig. Lila is now asleep with Gerry clutching her little green pig in her hand.

She is doing better today. I am slowly getting some eye contact and a few smiles. I have been taking her to breakfast without Gerry to give him some time without her clinging to him and to give she & I some time together. She is very calm and lets me feed her breakfast. We actually enjoy our time together but as soon as she sees Daddy she's DONE with Mama. I'm cherishing the little moments when she does connect with me and continuing to be there for her needs. She will soon learn how much I love her and that I will never leave her.

I'm including the email I sent to Becky to show how we were doing a few days ago which was not good...

> She still wants nothing to do with me. Yesterday sucked. She screams whenever Gerry is out of sight. I know it's a waiting game but it still hurts. I am getting more smiles and more eye contact today. >

I also emailed Stacey. She is an amazing friend and sent me some excellent advice given to her when she was going through the same thing with Lily. Christina, our SW from CHI, traveled with her and told her, "She told me I should be the only one to full fill her needs, Eating, bathing, diapers. Sometimes it was ugly. Eating out was the worst. Really embarrassing sometimes. Have Gerry encourage her to look to you for those needs. If it causes more problems him being there have him leave. Marvin would get Lily to sleep in/by my bed (we always had twin beds?) and then we would switch so Lily would wake up to me. Lila is older than Lily was so she can be a bit stronger. There was someone else in our group with a 2 year old and the mom pretty much gave up and stayed away. That is NO good. I told her to talk to Christina. Not sure what Christina told her. I'm sure the same as me. Within 2 days - HUGE change.

Take Grace down to the lobby for some one on one time. Gerry is probably spent and needs a break. At least my husband did. It's really hard on a person when you can't go to the bathroom without a screaming baby. Lily did better with me alone if were out of the room than alone in the room. I remember spending the 2 or the 3? night in the lobby for with a crying baby. Did you get a stoller? Start taking her for a walk around the hotel to give Gerry a break and for you and Lila time. Lily like that better I think because she didn't have to look at me the whole time."

At first it seemed really cruel to have Lily so upset with me full filling her needs but I was at my wits end and took the advice from Christina. You do what you have to do and what seems to work for you. Lila WILL be coming around soon. Tomorrow (it's 10:00pm there now) could even be the day it clicks for her.

So it is a trying time but she is so worth it. Each little smile and each little peek into what her personality really is, is precious.


The flight from CQ to GZ was short and it is nice to be here. Chongqing is Lila's birthplace and will always hold a special place in our hearts. Guangzhou is more enjoyable because it's a much more western and much cleaner city. Also the rest of the group is here and it has been so much fun to see everyone from Beijing with their new little ones.